Day 32: “Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe?” So, I cleaned out my closet yesterday to justify all my new purchasing that was about to happen. I mentally justify what I bring in, by the volume I put out. It’s simple math people. It is also part of what I call creating an “illusion” of my generosity to make me feel better about my self-indulgence in nice clothes. Hey, whatever works. There are a few things I really want that are ungodly expensive and I thought “hmmm I really need this and my public is expecting me to really step it up in these days of Carbalicious”. (Side note, I love that now my laptop and phone have accepted carbalicious and redonkulous as real words and no longer autocrorrect). I contemplated a Crowdfunding method, but then I thought 1. I really like being married and 2. A public stoning of a parent is not something most children can block out.
The above thoughts coupled with having one’s first vodka drink in a month had interesting consequences. Hysterically I was so used to making my La Croix over rabbit pellet ice with excessive lime juice- I forgot initially to add the vodka and then when I did I couldn’t really taste it. It wasn’t until I began online shopping that the libations presence became abundantly clear. Just an FYI as you go about your day: 1. Amazon is low on clean eating cookbooks and 2. “Looks we like” at Nordstorms is all out of anything a size 6 or 8.
I thank you all for your congratulations and also for your input on Blog name. I have decided to keep Blog name and tagline a surprise until it launches in a few weeks. But all of the 12 options will be used as titles for essays and/or chapters in my book that you will all buy and tell your friends, neighbors and UPS man to buy.
Here is a kick in a balls, there is a newly released book call “Sprinkle Glitter on my Grave” by a Mom with a show on Bravo and to put salt in our creative wound her first book was called “Sometimes I feel like a nut”. So I fear of copyright infringement takes Sprinkle Wheat Thins on my Grave off the table- but pretty sure this lady and I need to be friends.
So everyone is asking how was the first day of Wheat Thins? It was fab. So I ate on the Whole 30 yesterday except for the glorious serving of Wheat Thins and hummus, sushi for dinner and a vodka drink. And the best part- NO FUCKING NUTS!!! I still feel great, and sleep was off the hook. So I am not going to introduce dairy until Saturday. I know that is news you could not live without. I am not going to introduce sweets per se, but am being conscious of what I eat having added sugar. I do want to call out that the last time I weighed what I weigh now I was skinnier, which I am thinking validates the whole muscle weighs more than fat theory. My plan is to weigh weekly until Christmas to gauge impact of various foods, exercise and celebrations. Earth shattering news coming your way.
Sushi was off the hook by the way. I had conference calls until 6 pm yesterday and fam hit Mellow Mushroom without me and since I deserved a good meal, I postmated Sushi to myself. When I answered the door, I thought ‘this fine gentleman has no idea of his gift and his tip is going to make his day”. But really he couldn’t give shit.
My 3 things for today:
1. What makes me pee my pants? George Carlin. He speaketh the truth people. You likely see a theme with my comedians. I just love to laugh and think bringing social commentary out in a humorous way can be so powerful.
2. Things I love? The smell of new clothes. Like fresh.
3. Pet Peeve/Shit I find redonkulous? Adult acne and the fact that the massive underground zit only appears when you are about to stand up in front of a lot of people.