Day 17: “Harlan Pepper, if you don’t stop naming nuts”. Christopher Guest is a genius. If you have only seen Spinal Tap, trust me and add Waiting for Guffman and Best in Show to your repertoire- I promise you, your world will be better for it. And if you have never seen Spinal Tap…how are we friends??
Exactly 2 weeks left on my journey and there are not enough cuss words to express my exhaustion of eating nuts. Ok, that was almost as much fun as saying WIENER, almost. You can mix up the nuts as much as you want- salt them, roast them, sauté them in ghee…still ain’t no cracker. I get that it is good fat, satisfying fat and all that…just saying I am sick of nuts.
On a completely serious note, I feel I cannot go on talking about my cravings for food and alcohol without calling out my feelings on the devastating brain disease of addiction (to alcohol, drugs, food, sex or gambling) or very serious eating disorders which are worlds away from the healthy brain wanting a cracker or a glass of wine and wanting to fit into skinny jeans. I think it is unfortunate that we as a society do not recognize the disease of addiction, especially alcoholism, like we do other serious diseases such as cancer, alzhiemers and heart disease. I have seen addiction destroy people and those around them and there is nothing funny about it.
Back to unimportant things- I have a few friends who when they ask me how the Whole 30 thing is going and I say “look I haven’t had a carb in 17 days and I don’t have the energy to tell you- just check Facebook” and they say “I am not on Facebook….I mean what am I missing?” My immediate reaction is “me” and then this morning as I was looking at Facebook it came to me…here is what you are missing:
- Daily/Hourly reminders that your skin is crap and there are multiple people out there obviously making a shit ton of money solving this problem and if you trust them they will get a Lexus.
- Knowing that your life is not complete until you personally core out an avocado, put an egg in it and bake it.
- According to several Buzz feed quizzes all of your f’d up personality quirks can be validated and you have at least 3 other friends who care about what 80’s movies they are.
- The validation that most people love their kids more than you do and that your little people are less cute, less smart, less athletically inclined than your friend’s.
I made a major mistake yesterday I wish to share. As I work from home a lot, many times a week I will go to Starbucks or Panera to work for a change of scenery, some ambient noise and of course coffee and food. So herein lies my downfall, I neglected to remember that Panera is short for Panera BREAD..I lasted 15 minutes.
My three things for the day:
- What makes me pee my pants laughing? Christopher Guest- he is a genius. “You are all bastard people!”
- Things I love? The word redonkulous. Thank you Clare and Rob for introducing me to this word years ago. It expresses so much at one time.
- Pet Peeve? (or maybe I should rename “shit I find redonkulous?”??) The fact that woman on ALL local and national news cast regardless of locale, time of broadcast, political leanings, etc. all dress like they are about to go to a cocktail party. I just don’t get it. You can look nice and professional without wearing a cocktail dress.